HEADLINES [click on headline to view story]:

Personal Directions

The Doctor's Consultation 

Agony Column

Camera Class by Snapshot

Mrs. DoLittle’s Corner

Personal Directions: Self esteem and a little bit more …

By Christina Dodd,

I want to thank Sue Betts – who tells me that the weather in UK is still terrible! – who sent me this short piece on self-confidence and dressing for success. I believe from Sue that it is authored by, or adapted from a longer piece by Helen Johnson.

“Self-esteem is developed by feedback from other people but clearly it is within ourselves. We know this because all the compliments in the world will not increase our self-esteem if we think we don’t deserve it.

We will reject the compliment or laugh it off as a mistake. People with low self-esteem distort negative aspects of their body, this is a way of projecting their negative feelings more externally. One part of us begins to dominate and we begin to think things like ‘you know I would be handsome / attractive if it were not for this gigantic nose or this horrible chin’.

People with poor self-image tend to project those feelings on one part of their body more than others.

It is what is referred to as the ‘deforming mirror’.

All of us see ourselves in a deforming mirror where we don’t see ourselves as we truly are. Very few people have an accurate image of their body and women in particular see themselves as larger and fatter than they actually look.

Men see themselves more realistically.

Why would women be more negative about their bodies?

In this instance at least it seems that it is because women rate their bodies almost exclusively in terms of its attractiveness whereas men are able to rate their bodies on its attractiveness and its function - so if you looked like Brad Pitt it would be wonderful but if not, at least its strong - its almost as if men look at their bodies as an instrument and women look at their bodies as an ornament.

Research does indicate that women are more critical of their bodies than men - perhaps the influence of the media has something to do with this - if we were only to realise that the products being marketed to reduce wrinkles and help us lose weight are selling hope to all who buy. The industries generate the need for hope, manufacture the product and sell the hope.

There are a number of important changes we can make to change our body image.

1. Dress for physical pleasure.

Stop scarring your body by wearing clothes that are too small – ‘I’m going to fit into this size 12 even if it kills me’ and when you remove the size 12 your body is scarred.

Wear clothes that are comfortable - if you feel good you will feel better about yourself, hold yourself more confidently and feel confident.

Try dressing differently - if you usually dress casually, dress formal one day - show yourself that there are many ways to look and feel good about yourself.

2. Look at the whole of your body and not just a collection of parts.

Don’t reduce your identity to just one part – ‘I’m fine if it were not for my ears’.

Focus on how you feel rather than on how you want to look. Instead of I want to be thinner think ‘I want to be more energetic or more mobile’.

Thinking I want to be thin is focussing on an ornament - I want to be more energetic is focussing on an instrument which is there to do something for us.

3. Listen to someone else’s opinion of you.

It is difficult to like your whole self as long as you are going around criticising one part of yourself constantly. Very few of us have an accurate picture of ourselves and it is difficult to see a true picture.”

On another note …

This week I had the great (dis) pleasure to have to suffer a monologue from a dinner guest who decided to take it upon herself to tell all and everything about all and everything … ad infinitum, ad nauseum an add great irritation to everyone else at the table.

Being from California she is more likely to be liberal – or so I thought – of the faults and quirks of people. But this sadly was not the case. The grand finale came with a commentary and dissertation upon the American political system and an in depth, first hand Fox News style analysis of the merits of the various candidates, their wives, parties, associates, war records and all … ad infinitum, ad nauseum (and again) add great irritation to everyone else at the table.

During this discourse we all politely chuckled, ummed, aahed, oohed, squirmed and generally wished that we were elsewhere. But, despite all attempts to change the subject, the litany went on and on. As a side note, I did find it rather amusing, however, that the “incumbent” sounded distinctly as if he was secretly North Korean and was covertly The Great Leader!

After about half an hour I suggested - during a prolonged pause for breath on the “lecturer’s” part - that I had just received an email from a friend in the US, containing a “quiz” by Justin Ford. I suggested that maybe it would be an interesting little discussion piece and reasoning test for everyone at the table.

Surprisingly everyone agreed to the challenge! Here it is exactly as was sent to me …

Question:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts. Here are the only known facts about the three candidates. This is the only information that we are allowed to know about those who are vying to be Numero Uno:

Candidate A: Associates with crooked politicians and consults with astrologists. He’s had two mistresses. He also chain-smokes and drinks 10 to 12 martinis a day.

Candidate B: Was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college, and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C: Is a decorated war hero. He’s a vegetarian, doesn’t smoke, drinks an occasional beer, and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?

As can be imagined this brought good and vigorous debate with many varied opinions plus a great deal of highly animated conversation. Some debated the merits of the various leaders, some looked at their flaws as “life experience character building exercises” and others thought that they all sounded better than the present lot and should be signed up immediately!

But when the final vote came down it was fairly well unanimous.

I shall refrain from saying anything else, save that there is a trouble with taking things on first appearances or on the basis of inadequate or strictly massaged and limited information. his is evidenced by the revelation that:

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt. Candidate B is Winston Churchill. Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

Is there a moral here … at any rate immediately after the results were announced conversation for the rest of the party returned to normal!

If you would like to write to me or contact me further about any of our life coaching, personal development or business skills programs, then please email me at christina.dodd @asia trai ningassociates.com I’d be very happy to hear from you.

Have a great week!

The Doctor's Consultation:  Thoughts of Poxes

by Dr. Iain Corness

Whilst Smallpox has been eradicated from the earth (or until some idiot has a laboratory ‘accident’), Chickenpox is certainly here to stay.

According to the latest news reports, Chickenpox (Varicella) is also back here in Thailand again. 22,833 patients with the complaint between January 1 and May 1 this year. This nasty condition never actually leaves the community, lying quiet for a while and then attacking in epidemic proportions. Make no mistake about this one, it is a most aggressive disease that sweeps through schools and institutions and while generally a disease of children, it can attack adults too with devastating results.

The culprit is a virus, known as the Varicella Zoster virus, which produces the characteristic chickenpox lesions. These come out very quickly after an initial period of vague symptoms such as fever and aches in muscles and joints. The lesions (vesicles) are very superficial on the skin and grow like a mini-Vesuvius, burst and then crust over. That cycle of events takes around four days, but new crops of vesicles come up in waves in the first three or four days, so you can have some vesicles growing bigger while earlier ones are drying up and crusting over.

The vesicles generally come out on the trunk and face first, but can spread to all over the body and even inside the mouth and on the tongue. Now while scarring is always a worry for the Mums of this world, there are far worse effects from this little virus. There is a distinct possibility of an encephalitis in older children and adults can actually develop a Varicella pneumonia. Pregnant women who get Chickenpox also run the risk of infecting the unborn child, and this can run as high as 10%. Very often, especially if the child scratches the lesions, there can be an extra infection by an opportunistic bacterium on top of the viral lesions, so you get a double problem.

So what do you do when Chickenpox is doing the rounds? The first thing is to keep away from those who have the disease. It is highly contagious and is spread by inhalation of micro droplets in the air, or by direct contact with weeping vesicles. In a family, this means that little Johnny gets his own towel that no one else must use and a bed-time kiss is strictly forbidden.

Calomine lotion does help with itchy and weeping vesicles and trim the fingernails in young children to lessen the chances of scratching. With very little ones, I even suggest putting their hands in socks, just as you do with little babies.

If the temperature is raised (more than 37.5) then a little paracetamol will help (but not aspirin as this drug should not be used with children), and if there is the “super-infection” by a bacterium it will be necessary for your doctor to prescribe an appropriate antibiotic.

The other important duty that you have as a parent, is do not send little Johnny back to school until the very last vesicle has dried up. This is generally around a week to ten days, but is so important in trying to stop the epidemic.

The other nasty part of this virus is that it lies dormant in your system and can strike back many years later as Shingles, or as we doctors refer to it, Herpes Zoster. No, Chickenpox is not fun, and to those of you who are struggling with it right now, you have my sympathies.

Agony Column

Camera Class:  Camera Maintenance for Dummies!

by Harry Flashman

We happily take our cars in for maintenance, and do so because we know that eventually all mechanical things must fail, yet we expect our expensive cameras to last forever. This represents a double standard worse than double pricing, because we are fooling ourselves in this matter.

I have been asked before about what people should do (or shouldn’t do) regarding looking after their investment. With modern cameras costing many thousands of baht, it’s not a bad plan to maintain as much as you can.

For those readers who have missed my sage counsel, the first thing to remember is that cameras are very delicate pieces of equipment. They have lots of moving parts (shutters, apertures, film transport/wind on, etc.) plus expensive optical glass in the lenses, mirror system and viewfinder, let alone all the fancy electronics, batteries and such. The humble camera is not so humble these days.

Let’s start with the outside and clean it. Do not get the kitchen universal “Spray ‘n Wipe” all purpose cleaner and spray liberally. The family that sprays together doesn’t always stay together. With a clean soft brush (like a child’s water colour paint brush, or a lady’s make-up brush) gently wipe the nooks and crannies on the surface, round the eyepiece and all the little edges, and under the knobs. Now dampen a cloth with plain water and gently rub it all over the exterior of the camera body. By now, the camera should be looking like new again - but we’ve hardly started!

The next item to deal with is the lens. Unscrew the lens and put the camera body aside somewhere safe. With your soft brush gently dislodge any dirt and dust from the lens barrel. What is really good here is one of the soft blower brushes available in most camera shops for around 180 - 300 baht, depending on fancy packaging and a little bottle of cleaner. Go for the brush only type - do not use commercial camera cleaning fluid anywhere near your camera! Blow brush the lens elements as well (front and rear).

Now with a very clean damp cloth exceptionally gently clean both the front and rear surfaces of the lens. Use a spiral motion to clean from the centre to the edges. Use a fresh piece of the cloth and give it one last swipe. Put the cleaned lens aside safely.

Now let’s turn our attention to the camera body. This is where you have to put in the majority of your time, and the ultimate care and attention. There are certain things you must never do. Let’s look and note these first. You must NEVER touch the mirror or the focussing screen with your fingers. Even to change the focussing screen, you will be supplied with special tweezers by the manufacturer.

The other part of the camera that should never be touched with your fingers is the shutter. This is a very delicate part of the workings and can be bent or twisted very easily. The other DO NOT is oiling or spraying with CRC or other similar lubricating fluids. Leave lubrication to the manufacturers agents or camera repair shop only.

Now open up the back of the camera and clean the internals with the blower brush again, taking particular care with the channels where the back fits in as it closes. You are quite likely to find small particles of dust and dirt in the cassette holder area, as this is the part you open up every time you change film. The pressure plate inside the back has to be completely clean too, because the film emulsion runs across it. Any dirt or grit there will leave a scratch on the negatives.

The last area to check is the battery compartment. Again, a quick brush and blow should be enough. Do not use the damp cloth in here. Finally, if you don’t know how old the battery is - then change it for a new one.

That’s it. Your camera is now sparkling clean and ready for your next roll of film this weekend.

Mrs. DoLittle’s Corner: Khanom - A Sweet Lion

When there is enough love, the lion will lay with the lamb

In my last column I wrote about Jodie my dog, which had her own pets. My friends were as amazed as I was about how she cared for them.

Well, a couple of years later I was to meet a lion, which was even more amazing. Khanom was born at Chiang Mai Zoo, but was rejected by his mother, so had to be hand fed by the staff.

When I first saw him, he was so small he could lie in my hand and had to be fed with an eyedropper. He grew very quickly though and I found myself spending a lot of time playing with him.

He was just like a puppy, really, playing ball and wanting hugs. We named him Khanom in the hope that he would live up to his name and remain sweet.

Hey Nom, just checking to see if you still have your sweet tooth!

When he was about the size of a grown domestic cat, a jungle fowl arrived at the zoo clinic to be cared for. This rooster was quite a character, strutting around the office, puffing up his chest.

“Nom” tried to jump on him several times, but was pecked back into a corner. Soon he accepted the rooster as the “boss” of the office. Even as Nom grew bigger than the rooster, he accepted that he was at the bottom of the pecking order, because the clever bird would always find something higher than Nom to perch on, so he could look down on the lion.

Soon he was sitting on Nom’s back and the two were inseparable. It was quite a sight to later see a grown lion walking around with a rooster on his back.

When Nom weighed about 20 kilos I saw him catch a sparrow and then let it go. The bewildered bird sat motionless for a few minutes as if it couldn’t believe its good fortune.

At that time a lot of people drove into the zoo with rabbits hidden in their cars, which they released on the grounds. In the end there were hundreds of rabbits running around. It didn’t surprise me when one day I saw Nom and a rabbit lying together peacefully in the long grass.

As Nom grew bigger he got weary of some people who visited the clinic. He would hide in the long grass and the rabbit would stand on its hind legs, acting as a kind of lookout, signaling to Nom when it was safe to come out again. Sometimes I would see the rooster’s head pop out of the grass and then duck again. That’s how I knew where Nom was.

Some people didn’t think Nom was very sweet. The secretary at the clinic office was terrified of him and he knew it. Nom would steal her shoes or handbag and bring them into his den. Nobody but Mrs DooLittle could get them back. Sometimes I would come to the clinic and find a small crowd of people waiting for me to go into the lion’s den to get back many pairs of shoes.

Once he chased some repairmen up an electric pole and they had to wait up there for an hour until the staff found Mrs DooLittle to come and smack the naughty lion.

I used to walk Nom around the zoo very early in the morning before any visitors arrived. For some strange reason, which Mrs DooLittle does not understand, whenever people see a lion walking around, they scream and run. Nom always saw that as an opportunity to play chase the mouse. After all he was a cat. So rather than yell myself hoarse with, “don’t scream and don’t run,” we’d avoid people. Whenever he did catch someone, he’d just want to play.

They’d get ruffled up a bit. Then he’d let them go, just like the sparrow. Luckily nobody ever died of fright.

The last time I walked Nom I almost died of fright myself. We had stopped for a rest in front of the wild boar enclosure, when Nom suddenly remembered he was a lion and lions eat pigs for breakfast. He jumped up on the moat wall and was about to go over to chase the pigs when I realized what was about to happen.

I jumped on his back and flung my arms around his neck. He turned his head and snarled at me in the face. He had never done that before.

“Nom,” I cried, “please don’t eat me and whatever you do, don’t eat the pigs.”

If Nom didn’t eat me, I knew the director would kill me if Nom got into the pigpen. Nom responded by snarling and hissing and trying to shake me off.

I started to cry I was so scared. I thought this was the time I had dreaded, when he turned into the beast that he was.

“Nom, Nom, please be a good boy” ... Grrrrrrowl ... His mouth was right next to my face. His ears were laid back. He hissed at me. I closed my eyes and prayed to all the angels in heaven: Please let Nom be a sweet lion forever.

Then a miracle happened! A guy who sometimes helped me around the clinic walked past. He thought we were playing a game, so he pulled Nom’s tail. Then suddenly, Nom rolled off the wall and over on his back so we could tickle his belly. He became sweet again! I gave him a smack for scaring me like that and he ran off. When I got back to the clinic, he was waiting for me in his den. After that I decided not to take him into the public area again.

The morale of this story is: When there is enough love, the lion will lay with the lamb.

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