happens if I get divorced?
I married a Thai woman a few years ago and things have not turned out. She
has not cheated me in any way and she is not cheating on me. In fact things
are rather amicable but we simply are not compatible. She is a nice enough
woman but has little interests in life outside her soap operas and gossiping
with the neighbors. We aren’t arguing as she doesn’t even seem to care
enough about me or our marriage to even say anything other than what is on
her soaps. So, I am bored witless stuck with a woman that is more like a
live in maid than a wife.
I am currently on a marriage visa, I get one year at Immigration. What would
happen if we were to divorce before the one year was up? Can I just wait for
the next renewal or do I need to leave the country?
Also, we rent the house we live in, I was never that keen on the idea of
buying a house, it all seems rather dodgy so I thought I would rent for a
while and learn more about the system. The more I learned the less I wanted
to own. So, to make a long story short, I don’t have to worry about too many
assets in Thailand, just the car and the motorbike which she can have.
Do I have to worry about alimony too? I don’t mind helping her out for the
first few months or a year but I don’t want to support her for the rest of
her life, she can go get a job, she had one when we met and even though I
encouraged her to keep it she quit.
Thanks for any advice you can offer Emma, or any other readers. I am ready
to get out!
Soon to be divorced.
First let me offer you my sympathies for your upcoming divorce. Even if
things are ending amicably its always sad and difficult to see what you
thought would be a permanent relationship come to an end.
As for the visa, as soon as you do get divorced you will need a new visa.
You should probably consider going out of the country and getting a new visa
before the divorce occurs. The one year extension is no longer valid as soon
as you get divorced and you can get a 7 day extension at Immigration. But it
seems to Emma that it would be easier to me to just get a new visa. You will
need to decide if you plan on remaining in Thailand long term and if so,
what kind of visa you will ultimately need to get.
Thailand does not really have alimony, she would be entitled to half of all
assets acquired during your marriage but not to anything you owned before.
So, she is entitled to only half the car and half the motorbike but the
reverse is also true. So are you also entitled to half the car and half the
Even though you say its ending amicably you never know what the gossiping
neighbours might convince her of farther on down the road so you may want to
see a lawyer and get an agreement written up before you go to the District
Office to file the divorce papers.
Emma herself has never been divorced but a few friends have and when asked
said, to a man, to get the agreement drawn up first before going for the
divorce. They also said that it is quite a straightforward process once
things have been decided upon.
Best of luck.
Bought my girlfriend a car
I bought my girlfriend a car after she was in an accident on her motorbike.
She wasn’t badly hurt but it could have been far worse, she was quite lucky.
I bought her a good quality second hand car (there seem to be quite a few
nearly new cars on sale now!) but she almost never drives it. She does know
how to drive, or at least that is what she told me, but she rarely does. I
don’t mind to spend that money on her as I think it will save her life some
day, the roads here are quite dangerous! But she only drives it maybe once a
week; sometimes less. Even in the rainy season it remained parked more often
I have asked her why she doesn’t drive and she shrugged her shoulders and
said the motorbike was easier! I don’t understand this reasoning. Can you
explain to me why she doesn’t drive the car?
Well, I assume she has a job, could it be she finds the petrol expensive?
Many people have cars but cannot afford to keep them running. Add in
maintenance and it may be more expense than she can really afford. You do
not mention that you are helping her with the expenses. One does not like to
look a gift horse in the mouth but the gift horse should perhaps consider
the effect of the gift on the recipient first!
If she can afford the petrol, insurance and maintenance then it may be that
she does just find it easier. The city streets are often clogged, parking is
often difficult to find and if she is unused to driving may find the crowded
roads and small narrow streets a bit stressful. There are times of day when
if one is in town, the motorbike simply is much easier.
Finally, did she actually want the car or did you push it on her? Thai
people have great difficulty in saying no and she may have tried to tell you
she did not want the car but you overrode her wishes. Many westerners would
then say no more forcefully but most Thais will acquiesce to keep the peace
and then simply do want they wanted to do in the first place.
Your gift is quite generous and your motives not only admirable but correct.
However, as the old saying goes, “You can lead a horse to water but you
cannot make him drink.”
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