doesn’t my girlfriend like to share my interests?
I started dating this really nice Thai girl, she is a
couple of years younger than me and we have a lot of things in common.
However, I really enjoy going to the gym and work out and while she does go
with me, she doesn’t seem to enjoy it as much as I do. I feel responsible
for teaching her how to use the equipment but she usually just ends up
jogging slowly on the treadmill before sitting down and checking her phone.
Whilst I am a really keen weightlifter I certainly don’t
expect her to join in lifting weights but it would be nice if she showed
more interest in my hobbies and the things I enjoy.
What can I do to encourage her to join in?
Wants to share
Let me ask if you also enthusiastically join in doing
the things she enjoys doing? Are you there with her if she is out shoe
shopping or are you trudging along complaining about women and their need to
Emma has never really understood people who think it
necessary that their partner share their enthusiasm for every thing they do.
It is not necessary to spend every free moment together and it is certainly
not vital the success of the relationship that she embrace your hobbies and
In fact, your insistence that she pursue your
interests may just end up damaging the relationship instead. For heaven’s
sakes man, just let her get on with the things she likes to do and don’t try
to force her to become what you want her to be. Either you like her or love
her for who she is or you don’t and if you don’t then don’t try to mould her
into the person you want her to be. From the sounds of it, a female version
Tired of the hate posts on Facebook
I have many Thai friends on Facebook and they come from
both sides of the political divide and some of them post about it regularly.
A couple of them post what would only be called ‘hate speech’ anywhere else
and frankly, it makes me very uncomfortable as I consider these people good
friends but their posts are just vicious. It makes me look at them in a
different light, to be honest and wonder what is wrong with them that they
are so hateful over this. It doesn’t affect them in any kind of real way,
they have not lost their jobs or income or even lives. Yet their posts are
really awful. I don’t want to look at them but occasionally these friends do
post things I am interested in. I don’t want to unfriend them but neither do
I feel comfortable having their hate filled posts as part of my life.
At a loss
Rather than unfriend these people simply hide their
posts. Telling them you are not comfortable with their hateful posts is
probably only going to see them turn their bile onto you and that will
surely end your friendships. Alternatively, if you really do wonder what
kind of people they are then it may be best to unfriend them and distance
yourself from them. You never know what they are up to in their real lives
and you may not wish to be associated with them.
Have a noisy neighbor
I live in a condo building and I have a neighbor who is
really quite loud. Perhaps he is Frankenstein with lead feet or perhaps he
is the Jolly Green Giant and can’t help thundering around like a herd of
elephants. Worse, a herd of elephants that wanders around at 3 a.m. The
sound wakes me up nearly every single night.
Unfortunately, he happens to be my upstairs neighbor. I
am hesitant to go knock on his door because he sounds like he is about 2
meters and over 150 kilos or at least that is what his footsteps sound like
from downstairs. I have lived in this condo for some years now and he must
be new since I certainly would have noticed if he had lived upstairs before
this. I don’t have any intention of leaving my building because this man is
so rude. What do I need to do?
Sleepless in Chiang Mai
Perhaps old thunderfoot doesn’t realize he’s making
such noise. I would suggest, if you are fearful of a confrontation, to slip
a note under his door asking him to please tread softly at 3 a.m. as he is
waking up the below who live below him. A nice note is probably best since
most likely he is not aware that the noise transmits so readily.
If it were something else, like loud music, then you
could most likely put it down to simple selfish, self-centered behaviour.
However, walking is a different issue so Emma thinks the best option is the
note. Give it a try, if it doesn’t work then you will need to knock on his
door and ask him to walk softly and not carry a big stick.
I think the noodle lady likes me
I eat noodles at the same stall on a regular basis and
the lady who sells the noodles is always trying to chat with me, she often
gives me extra chicken in my noodles and today she gave me a discount. She
is always smiling at me and is very friendly with me, more friendly than she
is with other customers.
I eat there at least three times a week as I really like
her noodles but don’t know how to answer what seem to be her advances. I am
not interested in her, just her noodles.
Sometimes a smile is just a smile. I wouldn’t assume
she has any interest in you other than in retaining a good customer and
keeping that good customer happy. Thai people smile. Chiang Mai people are
friendly and chatty. Good businesspeople realize the value of offering
extras and discounts for good customers to keep the coming back. To assume
anything else will simply ruin your noodle enjoyment.