Heart to Heart
Saturday, Dec. 9 - Dec. 15, 2017
I love your column and am amazed at the
patience you have. I am an ex pat and live in Chiang Mai near the
university. So, it is not the seedy part of town like Loi Kroh. How you put
up with letters every week from idiots is beyond me. To all those who fall
for lines from bar girls, I say good they deserve to get the wallets
emptied. As a friend of mine (a former model in Los Angeles) said, Thailand
is for those who could not get laid in their own countries. For all those
idiots I have seen in bars bragging about the money they probably do not
have, they just raise the prices for what they want and none of the girls
cares whether the ‘Rolex’ they have is real. These idiots get what they
deserve. As far as I am concerned, send them all to Pattaya!
You really are the milk of human
kindness, aren’t you, my Petal. You make such sweeping accusations, and back
up your assertions from a “former model in Los Angeles.” How that gives her
(or maybe him) credibility, I do not know. Stop being so judgmental.
You send guys with GF problems to look
for a new one, instead of working through this one. You sent some poor chap
to go looking for another girlfriend just because she borrowed some money
from him and hasn’t paid him back yet. He gave the money and she’s been a
bit slow. Have you asked if she had some difficult problems? No, you just
sided with the fellow. Taking only one side in an argument is dangerous,
Hillary. You should be more careful.
Are you trying to give me a warning,
Sam? What do you want me to do with all the people needing my help? Say I’ll
deal with the situation as soon as you get your girlfriend to contact me
with your side of the story? Be real, Petal. This is a column for the
lovelorn, not a marriage guidance clinic.
I see that in Australia they have
legalized euthanasia. Do you think this is a good idea?
Whoa! This is way out of my league,
and anyway I’m not old enough to even consider it. The only aspect I believe
important is the Quality of Life in the person. But, honestly, this is not
an avenue for this to be debated.
Here’s the answer to half the problems
on your page. If your GF wants money all the time, then don’t do it. If they
leave then you know what it was they wanted above everything else, so why
fret? Good riddance to bad rubbish I say.
You aren‘t a very romantic soul, are
you! You are not describing a girlfriend, you are describing a maid. Big
difference. Maids will go to the highest bidder. Girlfriends are someone who
contributes something to the relationship. You have got the two confused,
Petal. Stick with your maid plus extras until a woman comes along who sets
your heart on fire, and you will understand the people who have written in
I asked a girl out from work as she
always gave me great come-on smiles every time I would see her. I did it by
SMS as I was a bit shy. After three days and hearing nothing I sent her
another SMS and she replied saying it was her birthday and she would have to
spend the time with her family, so sorry. What do you think, Hillary? Was
she letting me down gently or should I try another SMS?
You are certainly a bit thick. If
she wanted to go out with you she would have suggested a different day. You
have mistaken a Thai smile shown to you for interest in you. Keep looking,
but that one write down as experience.
There’s been some letters to you about
the Kid in the Candy store. As was pointed out, some foreigners never get
over the candy store phase, but I think you will find that this is because
they haven’t found the girl they really “clicked” with, so rather than
become a crotchety old thing (I’m not pointing the finger at you, Hillary)
they stay in the candy store, and I never hear many complaints. Have you
heard of serial monogamy Hillary? That’s what this leads to.
Billy the Kid
Dear Billy the Kid,
I am so glad you’ve got everything
in your life mapped out so well. It’s because of generous souls like
yourself that the candy stores can continue to trade. In the meantime a box
of Maynard’s Wine Gums will be very satisfactory. Thank you my Petal.
However, this cereal mahogany has me a little worried. Is this a breakfast
cereal the candy store sells? With colored hundreds and thousands on the
Update Saturday, Dec. 2 - Dec. 8, 2017
I started reading your e-letter reply to
the many readers who are Farang Khon (sic). I was at Soi Honey in August
and met a girl while having a drink. Incidentally, that day was her birthday and
she showed me her ID to prove it though I did not asked for it. I am open to
hearing anything. As it was unexpected, I did not have present at hand to give
her. However, I took out some “Ngern” and put it in her hand and wish her Happy
Birthday. I am touched by her sincerity. When I was at Suvarnabhumi Airport
going back to India where I am presently station, I message her but somehow it
didn’t get through due to connection problem. Two days later I tried texting
again and she received my message. We are now good friend and I told her that
one’s background is not an important criteria in friendship, but having a good
heart matters more than anything else. In short, one must have a positive mind
when visiting a foreign country and extend a helping hand to those who work
honestly for a living to support their families in the provinces, be it Sa Keow,
Issan or Rayong.
I think you should be very careful,
Petal. What was your young lady doing in Soi Honey? She sounds very much like a
professional chicken plucker to me, and you are ready to be plucked. What makes
you so sure that the lady has a “good heart”? Do you usually accost someone in
the street and say, “This is my birthday, and here’s my ID card to prove it.”
And ready to accept a cash deposit in her hot little hand. Proceed carefully,
Jaffery, and it is Khon farang, not the other way around.
How many times do you get letters from
tourists (and even long-stays) asking your advice on how to find the good girl
who will look after them and be honest and true (even though all the others
haven’t done it). I used to try and advise them, but I reckon these blokes get
what they deserve. They’re here for sex, and the girls are in the business of
sex for sale. They’ll never find their “good girl” there. Away from the bars, I
reckon no self respecting girl would want to be seen with some fat old bloke
wobbling along with a skinful of booze every night. You try telling ‘em,
Hillary, I’ve given up. They’ve got no (expletive removed) idea.
Al the Advisor
I understand where you’re coming from
Petal, but if you want to be an advisor you’ve got to do more than throwing a
bucket of warm manure over the people wanting advice. Once the average chap
understands what the bars are for, and what the girls who work in the bars are
there for, then you’re about half way there to finding someone who might be THE
ONE and obviously not from the bar scene. The bars are for fun, not for evers.
You are correct when you say that the chaps looking for a partner have to
present themselves in a good way as well. No Thai lady is looking for the kind
of farang you best know. Finding THE ONE is difficult in any society, in any
country, and is no different here. Just keep on showing those who ask of you
where they shouldn’t look, and you’ve done your bit, Al.
I went to see the navy parade a couple of
weekends ago with my Thai GF. She was all excited but I certainly wasn’t and
when the rain came, it was a farce. You know how well Beach Road drains with the
rain, so within 20 minutes it was half a meter deep and they had the navy blokes
marching in it. Splashing was more like it. Surely City Hall had a fall-back
route to take? It rains like this every year, it’s not like it was unexpected.
They could have had them marching up dry Pattaya Klang and then into Second Road
and back down through Hard Rock to Beach Road. Surely that would have been
better. It was on the front page of (the national newspaper). The world must
And I’m quite sure you were never an
Admiral. However, I suppose that the sailors would all have been used to getting
their feet wet so shouldn’t have worried them, and any submarines would have
been in their element. I’m sorry I haven’t got a direct line to City Hall, but
I’m sure they know by now that marching in half a meter of water was not the